Motherhood · SINGLEHOOD TO MOTHERHOOD · Uncategorized

SINGLEHOOD TO MOTHERHOOD (Vol. 1: Friends)

Mommy A

IFXH9399I know a lot will change when I became pregnant, not only to me but also to the people around me. When Niklaus arrived to my life, the change became more apparent. I have to re-prioritize and re-focus my energy to the little human who needed me the most. My selfish self is suddenly taking a back seat and my mother hat was firmly worn. Honestly, I thought I have prepared and made myself ready for the changes. But, it turned out I’ve only prepared for those things I have control and seemed pretty obvious like sleepless nights and other baby related stuff.

Today, I realize and finally accepted that I wasn’t really ready for the emotions brought by the changes with my friends. In my world and circle of friends, settling and having kids at twenty five would be considered a very young age. We were all still achieving and trying to achieve our own personal goals; living the life we want. So honestly, I have nothing against my friends, they are living the life the way they wanted it to be.

I have a very few close friends, and honestly, it’s hard keeping tabs with them while taking care of a little human. As much as I want to be there with them, to party with them, I couldn’t and sometimes, I don’t want to. It’s hard to say yes to an invite that does not consider you; I know it’s not all about me. But inviting a mom into something, you might as well know she already said no before because of the apparent reasons, is like saying I don’t want to see you there. It hurts, you know!

In 2015, I have managed to become an introvert and currently, I am probably on the extreme spectrum of being an introvert. I can’t remember making friends outside of work. Sometimes, I’m still having trouble making friends to people at work. So these changes are really affecting me big time, and I know I have to deal with it. I’m still figuring this out; probably make new friends, mom friends, who would have better idea of what I’m dealing with and where I’m coming from. Since, I have managed to become an introvert, might as well do the opposite now.

Tough times call for tough measures. Accepting it and thinking about on dealing with the problem is my first step on dealing this life issue. I’ll update this post once I have converted to an extrovert and gained mom friends.

Love,

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P.S. I planned at first to have a list of changes I’m having difficulty dealing with but realized to cater one post for each instead. Have you deal with this issue before? How do you deal with it?

 

Published by Mommy A

Hello there, currently a mom of one amazing boy and married to a supportive husband; also currently living with my mom, she is now taking care of my son while I pursue my career and other things in life. This blog has kept me sane from the craziness of everyday life as a career woman, a wife, and a mother. As an introvert, writing a letter to the people I love has been my way of telling them how I feel. I hate confrontations so I try to initiate the conversation instead thru a letter. Writing is also my way of processing my emotions which helps relax and give me a fresher perspective on things. I decided to put it in a blog to save on paper and hopefully to be able to go through my thoughts when I want to, I sometimes lost things and my diaries has been one of those. In a way, I also try to inspire or relate with you, my dear readers on how to cope and intentionally live our lives the way that feels right and makes us happy. Thank you for joining me in this little space. ~Love, Mommy A

6 thoughts on “SINGLEHOOD TO MOTHERHOOD (Vol. 1: Friends)”

  1. I also had the same struggle, A, lalo na at sa call center ako nagtrabaho. So yung sched ko pa lang di na talaga swak para makasama sa lakad ng tropa heh, high school and college. Pero it’s healthy din to meet them every once in a while. It feels good to catch up and remember the old days. Kahit paminsan minsan, set kayo ng date ahead of time para you can file a leave. Minsan kinakausap ko rin si husband kung pwede ako sumama sa lakad ng tropa and sya mag alaga sa mga bata. Don’t feel guilty na magsasaya ka kasi moms deserve some girlfriend times, too hehe. I also gained a few mom friends online and we talk thru Messenger. Aliw din, may natutunan kang iba at ang share kayo ng stories. Make new friends and from time to time, be with your old friends. Make conversations. Let me know if I could be of any help 🙂

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    1. Thanks Meg, I am actually trying my best to make conversations, ang hirap lang! Yes, your reply always helps me feel better in one way, hope to meet you soon again. but I’ll probably be awkward then.

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      1. Haha. Wag kang maglala madaldal pa rin ako kaya daldal ka rin :p Maybe you can start with asking them about something that you saw sa FB nil ganon or kung may nakwento sila sayo, follow up mo. Nasanay na lang din siguro ako mangamusta kasi kailangan ko sa work ko hehe. Parang kapag may nakita ko kunware sa FB na namasyal sila, ask ko yung kausap ko kamusta namn lakad nyo? ganun. Sa online naman yung mommy friends na nagain ko from time to time kamustahan. May gc kami, apat lang kami don kapag may gusto ishare like ulam or pic, share doon. ganun lang, simpleng chika hehe.

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      3. Hahaha mukha ngang madaldal ka pa din, wala na kong nakakausap from elementary days, it’s so good to talk with you even through this medium. Try ko yang mga sinabi mo, hehe thank you Meg!

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